Taylor Swift and Travis Kelce’s relationship has been in the spotlight since the “Opalite” singer showed up at a Kansas City Chiefs game in fall 2023.
But the pressure of being America’s Royal Couple (I said what I said) hasn’t gotten to the pop superstar and three-time Super Bowl champ. In fact, they’ve “never” had an argument, Travis revealed on the December 3 episode of his and brother Jason Kelce’s New Heights podcast.
The topic came up when Travis asked podcast guest George Clooney if he was “lying” about never getting into an argument with his wife, Amal Clooney, during their decade-long marriage.
“No, I’m not lying,” the Jay Kelly star said, before turning the question on the Chiefs tight end. “Well, it’s only been two and a half years, and you’re right, I haven’t gotten in an argument,” Travis replied. “Never once.”
Knock on wood that their conflict-free coupledom continues as they begin wedding planning (a notoriously stressful endeavor), but it does beg the question: Is never arguing with your partner the key to a healthy, long-lasting marriage, or can the occasional fight actually make your relationship stronger? Women’s Health tapped a few experts to weigh in.
Even the happiest couples aren’t immune from conflict, says Dr. Sarah Hensley, PhD, a relationship coach and founder of The Love Doc, but “securely attached people don’t argue—they discuss.”
FYI: A person’s attachment style develops during childhood and can predict how people behave in romantic relationships as adults. Secure attachment forms when you grow up with loving, supportive caregivers, which Taylor and Travis both seem to have.
“Their nervous systems likely learned early in childhood that it was safe to share their deepest thoughts, feelings, and fears with their parents,” Hensley explains. “This dynamic is likely what Travis is describing.
It’s likely that they have disagreements like every couple does, but they have the ability, like most securely attached people do, to work through disagreements in a calm and respectful manner.”
Not only is conflict pretty much inevitable, but it can actually be beneficial. “In general, conflict tends to be necessary for relational health,” says Tera Jansen, PsyD, a licensed psychologist and AASECT-certified sex therapist in New York.
“There is, however, a difference between productive vs. unproductive conflict.”
Couples who have productive conflict typically come out the other side with new learning and understanding of each other, which can help strengthen their bond. To do that, Jansen encourages couples to create a list of agreements for fighting fair.
“It can be very helpful for couples to get on the same page about what it means to ‘fight fair’ and set intentions about how they want to engage in conflict,” she says.
